The Myth of Work-Life Balance: 5 Tips to Manage It Without Losing Your Mind
Introduction
Goddesses, let’s be honest—work-life balance often feels like chasing a unicorn in high heels. We’ve heard it exists, some other women swear they’ve seen it (probably on some guy’s Pinterest), but the rest of us are pretty sure it’s a fairy tale—right up there with wrinkle-free linen and adult children who put their dishes straight into the dishwasher.
The truth? Balance isn’t about splitting your time evenly between work and life—it’s about protecting your time, energy, and sanity so you don’t lean so far in one direction that you forget you have a life at all. That means setting boundaries: the kind you hold firm to without apologizing, even when the ITSC (Itty, Bitty, Shitty Committee—aka the guilt gremlins of your mind), is trying to derail you by hissing in your ear that you’re letting someone down.
If you’ve ever tried to give 100% to your job, 100% to your family, 100% to your health, and 100% to your friends… you’ve already learned the math just doesn’t work. We do try, though, and end up exhausted, overbooked, and wondering if the people who do claim to have balance have the same 24 hours in a day—or a secret time machine they’re keeping to themselves.
The Problem With “Balance”
The word “balance” makes us think of a perfect scale—everything neatly in its place, like some Pinterest-worthy life spreadsheet. Real life? It’s more like a see-saw—some days your career demands the most of you, other days it’s your personal life calling the shots. Pretending every part of your life gets equal attention all the time is the express lane to guilt and burnout.
What’s Really Happening Behind the Scenes
For many women, “balance” isn’t just about time—it’s about energy and expectations. We don’t just work. We manage households, care for kids or aging parents, show up for friends, and keep ourselves presentable enough for Zoom calls (from the waist up, anyway). Then add the constant pressure to be healthy, calm, productive, and maybe even learn to bake sourdough—and no wonder we’re fried.
Here are those tips I promised.
1. Trade Perfection for Priorities (and Keep Your Sanity)
Ask yourself: What’s the most important thing today? Some days it’s crushing a work deadline. Other days, it’s showing up for your kid’s school play. Try to give both 100% at once, and you’ll give neither your best.
2. Set Boundaries Like a Boss (and Stick to Them)
If you answer emails at 10 PM, people will expect you to answer emails at 10 PM. Before you know it, you’re “just quickly replying” while brushing your teeth and wondering why your jaw hurts from stress-clenching. Boundaries aren’t selfish—they’re the instruction manual for how others are allowed to treat you.
Decide when you’re “on” and when you’re “off,” and then protect those times like you would a pint of your favorite ice cream—for me, that’s Kawartha Dairies Moose Tracks (OMG! What’s yours?).
If a colleague pushes back, smile sweetly and say, “I’m happy to get back to you during my working hours.” It’s not rude—it’s respect for your time, energy, and mental well-being.
When you set clear boundaries, you’re not only honoring yourself—you’re teaching others that you value your worth. And that’s the kind of leadership every modern woman needs in her toolkit.
3. Say “No” Without the Guilt Trip
Every “yes” you give is secretly a “no” to something else you desire and need—your rest, your goals, your sanity. When you say yes to things that truly align with your priorities, you’re not being selfish, you’re being strategic.
Here’s the secret: No is a complete sentence. You don’t have to wrap it in excuses, apologies, or a three-paragraph explanation about your schedule. Smile, be polite, and let it go. The people who matter will respect your boundaries; the ones who don’t… probably needed a “no” from you a long time ago.
Think of it this way: every time you say “no” to something that drains you, you’re saying “yes” to something that fuels you. And that’s a trade worth making every single time.
Check out my blog, “The Guilt Trap: How to Set Boundaries and Stop Apologizing for Taking Care of Yourself,” if you need some help setting boundaries.
4. Book Non-Negotiable YOU Time
If it’s not in your calendar, it’s not happening. We tend to treat personal time like loose change in a couch cushion: nice if you find it, but not essential. Wrong! Block time for rest, hobbies, or gloriously doing nothing, and protect it like a meeting with the CEO of Your Life (spoiler alert: that’s you).
My sister holds space for herself on Tuesdays; she has even named it “Temple Tuesday”—and that’s her day to focus on her own needs. She fills it with whatever feeds her soul—reading, hiking, personal development, or puttering in her garden.
If it’s sacred to you, it’s worth putting in ink on your calendar. Spending time doing something for yourself is time well spent. I love being creative and learning new things, and that’s what I enjoy during my sacredly protected personal time.
Here’s a little challenge: If you could add more of what you love but never seem to have time for, what would that be? Consider sharing your ideas in the comments below to inspire others. Let’s keep it fun and uplifting and not too personal—your Goddess halo should stay firmly in place and not make the rest of us blush!
5. Let the Right Balls Drop
Life is a juggling act, and here’s a newsflash, Goddess—you’re not a circus act (unless you secretly want to be—then poof—magically, you are!). Some balls bounce. Some break. The real skill is knowing the difference.
The bouncy ones—like skipping dusting the dreaded mini blinds or reheating leftovers instead of creating a three-course meal from scratch—will survive a drop. The fragile crystal ones—clear priorities, such as your children’s needs, your own health, or a cherished friendship—require your careful, precious attention.
When your plate’s too full, let the bouncy ones fall and roll under the couch—give those dust bunnies some company. They’ll be fine until you’re ready to pick them up. Giving yourself permission to drop the right things doesn’t make you lazy—it makes you strategic, sane, and able to keep what truly matters intact.
The Mindset Shift That Changes Everything
Forget chasing the mythical “perfect balance.” Instead, think of life as a flow—some days your work needs more of you, and other days your energy belongs more to home, health, or personal growth. The focus shifts, but it’s all part of the same whole.
When you accept the natural give-and-take instead of fighting it, you stop measuring yourself against an impossible standard. Your rhythm is uniquely yours, and it’s not meant to match anyone else’s. Trust it, honor it, and you’ll swap constant self-criticism for a calm confidence that says, “I’m exactly where I need to be.”
Goddess Takeaway
You don’t need one of those complicated color-coded planners on your fridge to be “balanced.” (Though you may need it to make sure you don’t miss your cousin’s wedding.)
What you do need is clarity on what matters most, the courage to protect it, and the kindness and self-compassion to forgive yourself for not being able to please everyone all of the time. That’s not just balance—that’s sanity, and it’s how a modern Goddess keeps her sparkle shining brightly without burning herself out.
When I do book signings, I usually write: “Goddess XXX, continue to live boldly and shine brightly, like the Goddess you are!” I gift that same message to you, right now. 💗
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